Numbers
by StuckInTheShire
Summary: Well, Fili assumed it was still broad daylight. Surely he had been there for so long it must have been midnight at least, thought Fili. And if so, why hadn't his mother or uncle come to collect him? - No slash


Fili sighed and laid his head on his arms on the desk as he tried his hardest to pay attention. Numbers were hard work and he was finding it increasingly more difficult to pay attention to the lesson being given by Glóin . He didn't want to be there, cooped up in a dusty, old, spare room in the bank with the elder dwarf going on and on about money. Being able to add wasn't important. Though when he had confronted his uncle about the matter a few days previously he had been told that ''How could he fight Orcs if he couldn't count?'' Apparently it wasn't right if he couldn't count how many he had killed. To be honest, Fili thought, what did it matter if he could or couldn't count how many Orcs he had killed. If there were more coming towards him that was all that mattered. However, unfortunately, his uncle had refused to let the young dwarfling start weapon training until he knew the basics. So here he was. Learning the basics. That meant sitting for hours at a time, in a small room cramped with Glóin and a few other dwarflings who were old enough to learn the wonders of numbers, not moving all day and being expected to listen to the entire lecture.

''As a banker, you have to be sharp with numbers, the same with a merchant. There are lots, if not all, jobs that need numbers to help you complete successfully. Let's see. Dofgem, what would you like to be when you are older?'' The young dwarfling sitting next to Fili screwed up his face in thought, humming quietly as he weighed up the options.

''I want to be a healer.'' The boy said.

''Ah, like my brother Óin. Yes, you see you need numbers for that too.'' The boy gave his elder a questioning look. ''How will you know, how much of an ingredient to add to a medicine or mixture if you can't count or add?'' The boy nodded. ''Fili?''

Fili looked up with an innocent look on his face. He had been pulled from his stupor by the dwarves deep voice calling his name and had completely missed the original question, however wasn't about to let him know. To be honest with himself, he was more than a little afraid of the large dwarf. ''How about you, hmm?'' Fili turned his gaze back to his arms and bit his lip as he searched for any answer that might have been the right one.

''Is it thirteen?'' He asked shyly, slightly hurt when the rest of the group burst into laughter.

''Try to pay attention, Fili. I asked, what would you like to be when you are older?''

''I want to go on adventures.'' Fili said his face lighting up. ''With Uncle Thorin and maybe even Kili, if he hurries up and learns to walk. It's taking him ages.'' Glóin nodded, however a few sniggers lingered in the air.

''How about king?'' Glóin asked, raising an eyebrow. Fili stuck out his tongue and shook his head violently.

''No. I won't want to be king.''

''Why not?''

''Because I'm not Uncle Thorin.'' Fili said sternly. ''I want to go on adventures and not be king.'' Glóin gave a small, knowing smile but quickly turned away from the subject of kings and thrones.

''You know, you still need numbers for adventures. You need to know how much of a thing to pack, and how many of things you have left. You also need to be able to count your footsteps so you don't get lost from home.''

''You use a map for that!'' Fili said. ''There are _hundreds_ of steps to the Lonely Mountain, it would take too long to count and I would forget where I was up to when fighting Orcs.'' He sat up straight and began to fiddle with the end of his neatly braided hair.

''The Lonely Mountain?'' Glóin asked, real surprise coating his voice. What on earth had Thorin been telling this child to get him all excited about Erebor already?

''Yes. Have you not heard of it?'' Glóin laughed softly. Of course he had.

''Yes. I have.'' Fili smiled.

''Well maybe you can come with me and Uncle to reclaim it, one day.''

''I'd like that, thank you.'' Glóin said, his voice soft as he thought about his once home and touched by the offer the young dwarfling was making. ''You see, we will need numbers on our adventure.'' Attempting to divert the subject back to numbers, the elder dwarf smiled at the class, stroking his beard slowly. ''We will need someone to count the gold in Erebor, and check that the dragon has not hidden any of it away.'' Fili shook his head.

''It's impossible to count all the gold in Erebor.'' Glóin could see that already the young dwarf was being heavily influence by his uncle, and how proud little Fili was of the home he'd never seen.

''Well, it is if we never finish this lesson. Now, let's concentrate on the matter at hand shall we. Taror, let's see if you can try this question.''

For the remainder of the lesson Fili's attention wavered, thought he tried his hardest to pay attention his mind wandered before he finally gave up and leaned back into his chair. It was so hot. Fili could feel his clothes slowly sticking to him as the air began to feel so hot it was suffocating. The stuffy room cramped with dwarves and papers and files, and of course Glóin insisted on keeping the door tightly closed and the candles burning, even though it was broad daylight outside. Well, Fili assumed it was still broad daylight. Surely he had been there for so long it must have been midnight at least, thought Fili. And if so, why hadn't his mother or uncle come to collect him? Had they just chosen to leave him there the night as it was already so late? Fili could imagine the conversation.

''Oh dear, Thorin. We forgot all about Fili!'' Dis would say, in her arms a sleeping Kili, or perhaps a toy she had been cleaning away. Thorin would be sitting in his arm chair, smoking his pipe by the fire and humming.

''It's too late now. He'll have to stay there. I'm not going out at this time.'' Dis would nod in agreement and smile lovingly down at the bundle in her arms, or turn to wash the dishes.

''Okay. Maybe we will pick him up tomorrow.''

''Not if he hasn't learnt his numbers. That boy has got to learn to pay attention in class.'' Dis nodding again at her brother's statement and would hum to herself.

What if they had just left him? What if they had been so adamant about him learning his numbers so they could just abandon him with Glóin in this stuffy old room for the rest of his life? What if even Glóin didn't want him and he had to wonder the world alone without a mother or an uncle to care for him? The conversation playing out through Fili's mind turned from 'We forgot Fili' to ''That Durin we got rid of Fili' and he couldn't decide which was worse. What if Glóin forgot about him too, locking the door in the evening and leaving Fili alone in the stuff, old, spare room in the bank all alone? Both his mother and uncle wouldn't go looking for him and Kili was young enough for him to forget about his brother if not prompted by an adult in the house, so he wouldn't be bothered. Imaged of Thorin moving Fili's bed out of his room and placing it outside among the twigs and sticks found to keep the fires going, his mother handing all of Fili's favourite toys over to Kili with a loving smile on her face.

Tears prickled at the sides of Fili's eyes and he tried to swallow the tight lump forming in his throat. He dropped his head, letting his blonde hair and braids fall around his face. Thorin said that he shouldn't cry, but mama said that it's better to show your emotions rather than bottle them up. A small sob escaped his lips and another thought of all the years without him that Kili would enjoy with his mother and uncle. He bit his lip trying to looks strong in front of the others who shared the same lesson – they obviously didn't realize how late it was. Maybe they were all in on the plan too.

'Fili?'

Fili looked up slowly, prying his head of his arms and opening his eyes slowly. He hadn't realized they were closed, but now that he looked around him the room was fuzzy and out of focus.

'Are you coming?' Fili moved his gaze up to look at the elder dwarf stood in front of him. Glóin looked down, concern covering his face as the little dwarfling looked up with pleading eyes and flushed cheeks.

'Are you going home?' Fili mumbled softly, noticing the now emptiness of the room around him. Glóin turned his head slightly in confusion.

'Not yet. Are you okay?' Fili nodded slowly. He moved a small, clenched fist to rub his eyes and sniffed.

'It's smoky in here.' He said. Glóin smiled knowingly, already the boy was so like his uncle, a proud dwarf who made any excuse to hide his emotions and be the strong warrior he was meant to be.

'Everyone's going home now. Are you not feeling well?' The bearded dwarf drew out the chair in which Dofgem had been sat earlier and sat himself down, looking at Fili.

'I'm fine.' He wanted to ask if Thorin was outside waiting for him but he didn't want to know.

'Thorin will be here in a few minutes, I imagine. Is he picking you up?' Fili looked down again. Well he wasn't here so maybe that meant he wasn't ever coming. Another small sob escaped from Fili's lips and he silently used the worst curse he knew. Now Glóin would know that Thorin was never coming.

'Fili? What's wrong?' A shiver ran through Fili and he looked up with large eyes.

'Uncle Thorin is never coming. He hates me. I couldn't learn my numbers and he hates me. He's going to leave me here until I learn them all and I won't ever learn them. Mama will agree and then Kili will grow up without me.' All of a sudden every thing Fili had been thinking came out as he stared at the older dwarves kind face and burst into tears. To his surprise a soft chuckle filled the air as Glóin gathered him up in his arms and place an ink covered hand on the boys blonde hair.

'What on earth made you think that?' Glóin asked, trying to hide his smile.

'We'd been here so long, Thorin has already come home from the Forge and Mama must have put Kili to bed already. We've been here so long.' Glóin forced down his smile again.

'Now I know you haven't been paying attention. What will Thorin say to that?' Fili's eyes widened as he looked up at Glóin. He was going to tell Thorin that Fili hadn't listened and then Thorin would make him stay all night. 'Did we not talk about the time during the lesson? How we can use both the sun and a sun dial to check what time it is?' Fili shifted in his seat. He hadn't heard.

'Will Uncle Thorin hate me?' Fili asked after a few minutes of silent reviewing the lesson in his head and he realized that he remembered little of it.

'You uncle does not hate you. Far from it. He loves you very much, though I am sure he will be a little bit disappointed that you didn't pay attention during the lesson. But I'm also sure that you can make him proud when you pay attention through the rest of the lessons.' Fili nodded slowly. Make Thorin proud. He could do that.

'So...' Fili paused. 'Both Ma and Uncle Thorin want me at home?' This time a booming laugh erupted from Glóin, who tried to quieten down when he saw the hurt expression of the blondes face.

'I am sorry, laddie.' He said, 'I just don't know where you idea's come from. What on earth made you think that they didn't want you?'

'I couldn't see the sun. So I thought it was late. I-' He took a deep breath, trying to forget about the feeling of immense stupidity rising in his stomach. 'I thought they had left me here.'

'Never.'

Both Fili and Glóin turned at the alien voice in the room. Thorin stood, dirty faced and sweat making his braids stick to his face, most of his hair tied behind him in a low pony tail, in the door way. Fili leapt down from the high, wooden chair and ran over to his uncle, slamming into him with such force that Thorin had to root his foot in the ground behind him to keep his balance. He bent down and placed a grubby hand on the back of his nephews' head and bashed his forehead gently against the blondes.

'I would never abandon you, little one.' Fili gave a little nod and a smile. Straightening up, Thorin took hold of Fili's hand and gave Glóin a smile. 'So, how did the lesson go?' Fili looked up at Glóin and bit his lip nervously. Uncle Thorin always said it was best to _only _lie in threatening situations. Mama said it was not okay to lie. Glóin obviously said that it was only okay to lie when the situation called for it.

And Fili was glad for that.

**Aww please review c: It means so much to me, thank you very much :3 **

**Ah, once again with Fili. I'm sorry, I just love his character and his past and relationship with Thorin interests me slightly more that Kili's - oh yes, that's another thing. I'm sorry that Kili's not in this (or the last one either) but I'll be sure to include him soon! **

**Okay, so Fili is meant to be around 5 years old (in human years) in this fanfiction - because that's the age when you start school here in Britain, so Kili will just of been born (obviously Fili's a little impatient for his brother to grow up - hence the ''maybe even Kili, if he hurries up and learns to walk'' line) **

**I'm sorry for any mistakes or anything that you find, If I see any more I will try and change them :) But apart from that, **

**Thank you! for once again reading my writing and hopefully enjoying it. It means so much to me so thank you! **

**- Hopefully some more soon c: **


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